Not myself lately..

Funny story, I actually started this post over 2 weeks ago.  And then forgot about it.  And then decided to write something about how I haven’t been feeling myself lately.  So this is apparently both a theme and a symptom of what I’m talking about right now.

This is the text from the original post:

“I’m realizing that I’ve been giving too much mental and emotional real estate to things that are draining me.  I have a tendency to do that.  So I’m taking a little time to reevaluate where my energy goes, as is often necessary with chronic illness.

I want to start posting tarot pulls again, though in all honesty, like 3 people were actually reading those.  I need to get a new phone so that I can continue my Bewitching the Cards series on YouTube.  I want to really start collecting/testing/perfecting my recipes for my Vegan Pagan Kitchen books.  I need to edit my novel.  There’s a lot that I really care about that I’ve been neglecting, because my energy has been pulled in other directions.  It’s time to draw a line and get back to myself, get back to what feeds me and makes me feel good about myself.”

I wrote that on August 1st.  Here it is, the 17th, and I haven’t done what I said.  I’ve been so scattered, so confused, so frustrated, so locked inside my own head that I haven’t been doing the things that are good for me.  I haven’t been emotionally/mentally healthy.  I barely even tried to celebrate Lughnassadh.  However, I feel like I’ve turned a corner.  I’ve drawn a line.  I’ve pulled back some energy.  In short, I feel better.

Also, I have a great new phone, so I can start recording videos again!  I’ve been making new friends on Facebook and other places, and I’ve started trying to repair things with the Lion.  I feel like I can see a way out of the crazy, and I’m going to pursue that.  I want to come up with something new and interesting to do here.  Maybe a series on ingredients used in kitchen witchery?  Maybe more poetry- GOOD poetry this time?  Who knows?

At any rate, it’s time to get back to me, and back to doing the things that make me feel good.

Blessed be.  <3

4 Comments

  1. Dave mcgrath says:

    I want you to know that your writing and podcast work brought me great joy and clarity at a very lost time in my life and continue to inspire and motivate me to seek truth and not doubt my sanity

    1. Thank you hon. You’ve really helped me a lot too. It’s so nice knowing that I’m not just sending my voice into a void, and your thoughtful comments have meant SO MUCH to me over the years. I should say thank you more often, and I want you to know how much you are appreciated. *sending you hugs and love*

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